The Vegetarian

Klaus Enrique Gerdes

THE MAG

http://magpietales.blogspot.com.au/

gave us the illustration to work on

THE VEGETARIAN

Klaus was an animal lover and he would eat no meat.

'Vegetables', he often said, 'Are all we need to eat.'

But all his mates were meat-eaters; they very clearly said

'Meat is needed by human-beings! Get that into your head!

We need it to have shiny hair and clear and healthy skin!

We need meat for our blood and bones! Denying that's a sin!

Think of your sinews! Furthermore, your arteries and veins

Would just collapse without red meat! Klaus, please use your brains!

Yes, brains! Now there's another thing! You'd be dull as a post

If you didn't eat your beef and pork, for they sustain you most.

Eating nothing but fruit and veg is utterly absurd!

 Really, Klaus! Wake up to yourself! We don't believe a word!'

*

Klaus just smiled, for, after all, he had a clever plan.

As you see above, he easily proved 

'Meat does not maketh Man.'!

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The Prompt

THE DRIVING LESSON

When I was learning to drive I went out on the road with Tom;

I'd scarcely learned to work-out which was 'To' and which was 'From'.

We came up to this road-sign which was simply painted white

And I began to panic.... was it 'Left' or was it 'Right'.

Tom yelled , in a terrified voice, 'You idiot! It's a Reverse!

So, of course, I obeyed him and reversed into a hearse!

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