Monday, June 4, 2012

The Vegetarian

Klaus Enrique Gerdes

THE MAG
gave us the illustration to work on

THE VEGETARIAN

Klaus was an animal lover and he would eat no meat.
'Vegetables', he often said, 'Are all we need to eat.'
But all his mates were meat-eaters; they very clearly said
'Meat is needed by human-beings! Get that into your head!
We need it to have shiny hair and clear and healthy skin!
We need meat for our blood and bones! Denying that's a sin!
Think of your sinews! Furthermore, your arteries and veins
Would just collapse without red meat! Klaus, please use your brains!
Yes, brains! Now there's another thing! You'd be dull as a post
If you didn't eat your beef and pork, for they sustain you most.
Eating nothing but fruit and veg is utterly absurd!
 Really, Klaus! Wake up to yourself! We don't believe a word!'
*
Klaus just smiled, for, after all, he had a clever plan.
As you see above, he easily proved 
'Meat does not maketh Man.'!
*
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The Prompt

THE DRIVING LESSON

When I was learning to drive I went out on the road with Tom;
I'd scarcely learned to work-out which was 'To' and which was 'From'.
We came up to this road-sign which was simply painted white
And I began to panic.... was it 'Left' or was it 'Right'.
Tom yelled , in a terrified voice, 'You idiot! It's a Reverse!
So, of course, I obeyed him and reversed into a hearse!
*

15 comments:

Living In Williamsburg Virginia said...

The veggie man is too funny.

Darryl and Ruth :)

Trellissimo said...

Nice one! LOL

Other Mary said...

Haha - clever Klaus! And clever you!

Brian Miller said...

smiles....no it does not but i def need my meat....i dont mind slaying the veggies as well though...

Suz said...

ha ha indeed

Helen said...

Oh yes ... this is quite the clever Mag! The older I grow, the more difficult to digest that meat! Give me veggies, give me fruit!

Tess Kincaid said...

This made me smile...and made me hungry...

Anonymous said...

Truth in the end and a lovely write

Berowne said...

Very enjoyable...

Unknown said...

I love your verse and the angst of the decision concerning meat. Keeping the arguments short and pointed gives life to this poem. Thank you for sharing. =D

Dave King said...

I'm an almost veggie and enjoyed this a lot!

Judy Roney said...

Thank you for the laugh this morning. So very creative.

Mr. Walker said...

I like "The Vegetarian" and how you've given Klaus a voice to go with his visuals. Nicely done!

Richard

21 Wits said...

Oh this was too funny ...just how can one veggie man lead so many cool and twisted stories!

Silent Otto said...

Very entertaining, is Klaus German for Chris ? , its nearly Christmas down south here.