Thursday, August 9, 2012

Underground Wit


SIGNS SIGNS

UNDERGROUND WIT

More a poster than a sign, but still well-worth the reading
Here is some information the traveller should be heeding.
He's told he can travel on the Underground from where he is to the Tower,
Although I admit the poster omits the price, also the hour.
And then he's reminded of history he probably learned at school......
How, in the reign of Henry the Eighth, chopping off heads was the rule,
Especially the heads of errant wives, for Henry paid no heed
To all their protestations, however they might plead.
The painting is rather fine, too, done in an old-time style.
Not a sign, but a poster, to make the traveller smile.
*
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BOOTLEG HOOCH

Al was desperate for a drink but the rain was pouring down;
The vendor of his bootleg hooch was on  the other side of town.
May, his current floozie, was starting in to whine
'If your lips don't touch liquor they surely wont touch mine!'
'But May' said Al, 'It's raining! I'll be soaked to the skin!'
But he could tell by the look on her face he wasn't going to win.
She said 'Take my red umbrella!' And Al, of course, demurred
Saying 'That will ruin my image! I'll simply look absurd!'
However, May had tempting lips, so he took the red umbrella,
Hoping that people in the street would see he was a fella.
So Al collected his bootleg hooch and stayed as dry as a bone.
(I hope you enjoyed this insight into the life of Al Capone!)
*

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