Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Sign Please

'mumble, penetrate, drag'


Please sir, I'd like to be a ghost.
How long have you been dead?
Only a minute or two milord.
And do you feel full of dread?
On the contrary, I feel wonderful!
Ready to have some fun?
I've always fancied haunting.
No sooner said than done.
Can I choose my own methods, sir?
Well, there are limitations.....
I've got some wonderful ideas!
Not too many complications!
I'd like to drag myself along.
Right! I'll supply the chains.
I'd like to penetrate the woods!
And how about country lanes?
And I'd like to sort of mumble.
You can if you add a groan.
But I want to be original!
I won't let you be a clone!
I thought, maybe, I'd grind my teeth!
A capital idea!
And then I thought I'd whisper threats.....
Ha ha! In each shell-like ear!
So do you think I'll make the grade?
I think that you'll do fine!
What's the next thing I must do?
Just sign on the dotted line.



Has the universe a beginning; has the universe an end?
How many people in the world consider me a friend?
Does garlic taste the same to me as it does to other folk?
Why do I feel uncomfortable when someone tells a joke?
How long am I going to live? (Do I really want to know?)
How tall are Max and Blake and Harry (grandsons) going to grow?
Would boredom be a problem if they shot me into space?
Will atomic warfare bring the end of the human race?
Is it hot inside a burqua and underneath a veil?
Would I enjoy life quite as much if I'd been born a male?
Will there be bush-fires this summer? I'm rather hoping not!
Would it hurt less to be hung or hurt less to be shot?
Was it really so dreadful in the days when kids got the cane?
I'd ask a lot more questions but thirteen have 'crashed' my brain!


Gemma Wiseman said...

Still chuckling about the ghost contract! An original slant! And your questions are an interesting mix of personal and universal!

Linda Jacobs said...

Your ghost poem is so original! Made me chuckle!

And, yes, asking too many questions can crash our brains! I'd rather not know the answers.

andy sewina said...

Love the conversational style here!

Kay L. Davies said...

Another vote for the ghost poem. I want to be one, too, but without the chains and teeth-grinding.
And your questions are great. (I'm sure many people who haven't even met you consider you a friend.)
— K

Kay, Alberta, Canada
An Unfittie's Guide to Adventurous Travel

Unknown said...

The notion of requesting ghost status tickled me and the piece kept me smiling throughout. Great concept.

Shail said...

The ghost poem is funny :) I love it.

Springcycle said...

Lovely humorous take on the three words. Your poetry never disappoints!

Anonymous said...


You write fabulous stories,

Please check out short story slam week 9 today.

Hope to see you around.