Friday, February 10, 2012

Twisted Fortune

presented us with the book cover

Would this blurb make you want to read the book?

Galahad Higginbottom

Introducing his brand new
Is the youngest son.
The eldest son,
Is taller,
 More handsome.
Chauncy is, also,
Evil beyond belief!
When Allard demands his
Rightful place,
Chauncy taunts him.
'I have hidden your crown
Where it can never be found!'
'Find your crown
And then you can wear it!
Follow Allard's adventures
As he seeks his crown!
Will he find it in
The Pit of Putrid Pythons?
Will it be hidden in
Valley of Vexatious Vipers?
Learn how Allard finds his crown,
And wears it with pride.
But will he defeat Chauncy
In the Great Battle of Hellfreezeover Hill?
More twists than you thought possible!
Look out for volume two:
'Twisted Result'
And all the future 'Twisted' novels.
In other words
'Get Twisted!'
Buckingham Palace Newsletter: This novel makes my family life seem uneventful! Signed: The Queen.


Valentine's Day is not, I find,
For one, like you, who speaks her mind.
I'd always try not to 'speak ill'
But then I'd add a codicil!
'Yes, I suppose you're pretty nice;
I bet you got this ring half-price.'
'Yes, I suppose I love you lots,
But not with all those acne spots!'
'Yes, I suppose I do adore you,
But I loved Henry long before you!'
'Yes, the flowers were quite divine,
But I'd rather have had some good red wine.'
'Yes, I've given you my heart,
But you're not having any other part!'
'Yes, you are my Valentine,
But sometimes you're a perfect swine.'
'Yes, I know we're a perfect couple;
At least, we were when you were supple!'
'Alright! I'll love you till I die!
(But I really can't imagine why!')
Dear Saint Maxine, on this date
Let you and I just celebrate
By speaking our minds as we always do!
Maxine! Yes! I do love you!

1 comment:

Kat said...

'Yes, you are my Valentine,
But sometimes you're a perfect swine.'

The Carrot and the Stick ?...!!!!!