Friday, September 2, 2011

Final Fulfilment

supplied the book cover

Flerkin Tomwallop.

(A note from the author; ' My niece, Clarice, was always reading Romantic novels of a trashy kind, instead of studying for her History Degree. I wrote this History in a romantic vein, so that she could study and drool, at the same time. I hope it assists other students.' )

Now Read All about It.

Love never dies.
Marcella and Flavius meet and fall in love in Ancient Rome.
Learn how they are separated in an appalling manner.
Read their dying words: 'One day, my love, we will be together.
Discover how their ghosts search the world for each other.
Marcella haunts the battlefields of Turkey.
Flavius becomes a gangster in New York!
And so much more!

Finally, as a Monk and a Concubine, they are united in a peaceful cloister.
To part no more.

History and Mystery!
Learning and Yearning!
What a combination!

From the History Department, Harvard University, newsletter; ' Never before has an author appealed so appealing to the Lower Classes!'



'If you really want to know ........'. How I've longed to say that phrase!
Responding to a query that I've listened to, most days!
The girl behind the counter, who really doesn't care at all,
Puts the question to me in a vapid sort of drawl.
'How are you today?' she says, with almost no sincerity,
And I get the urge to answer-back with venom and asperity!
I long to hold the line up with a litany of complaints,
Enough to try the patience of a line of shopping saints.
I'll start right at the top and I'll continue down my spine!
Soon everyone will know about the anguish that is mine!
The headaches in the morning, and the indigestion pills;
The big toe with a blister and my many other ills!
The cramp I get at midnight, and the problems in the 'loo';
The awful time I had last winter coping with the flu!
Then I might move on to DNA and my future prospects looming,
Even though it's clear the waiting line is shuffling and fuming!
I'll only stop when I see the girl is getting close to tears!
Then I'll say 'If you really want to know about it just pin back your ears!'


Kay L. Davies said...

Oh, good, ghosts and scholars. Me, too. I love your "history and mystery!" I want to buy this book to find out how someone named Flavius manages to be a gangster in New York.
— K

Kay, Alberta, Canada
An Unfittie's Guide to Adventurous Travel

Bookie said...

Your book definitely sounds like it would get the attention of YA readers! Might throw a vampire in that cloister too!

Lisa Ricard Claro said...

As a Monk and a Concubine . . . these two souls have certainly run the gamut! LOL I have to admit, this sounds like it would be a delight to read.

Oregon Gifts of Comfort and Joy said...

This is a fun take ... reminds me of an Amy Tan with all the ins and outs of reincarnation and past lives.

I love your poem too ... but can't help thinking that those clerks who are interested and do care get in trouble for having slow lines as the peeps behind me have to wait, lol.

Have a wonderful weekend!

Kathy M.

jabblog said...

That's one to make the blood race!
I agree with you about the check-out girls - and men - who inquire so solicitously after the customer's health *spit*

Susan Fobes said...

Over the top and loving it this week! A monk and concubine? LOL!

Grandma's Goulash said...

"If history were told in stories, it would never be forgotten."
Rudyard Kipling

I'm willing to bet that no one would forget this story. Your humor shines.

Tammy said...

My first thought was that I would buy that book for the author's name alone. I ask you, who could resisit a book by Flerkin Tomwallop?? But by the time I got to the monk and concubine, it was all over. Please give us the learning and yearning!