He was strolling through the desert as intrepid as can be,
When he was attacked by Monoliths as you can plainly see.
They may look rather featureless and harmless from their backs,
But if they turned around I'm sure they'd stop you in your tracks!
Great gaping mouths, and jagged teeth, with lots of fresh blood dripping.
I tell you, in a horror film you'd find them simply gripping!
But Malcolm is so fearless that he didn't turn a hair
When one of them came up to him he said to it 'Stop there!'
With just one powerful hand he held the ghastly brute at bay,
He stood right in it's shadow and merely shouted 'Stay!'
(He'd tried it out on dogs before so he knew the technique worked!)
The Monolith was so surprised it quivered and it jerked.
So that is how we got away! No Demon could catch us!
We found the other tourists and just got back on the bus!