ONE STOP POETRY
http://onestoppoetry.com/
asks us to attempt an
asks us to attempt an
Ottava Rima.
This is a poem with eight iambic lines with the pattern abababcc
This is a poem with eight iambic lines with the pattern abababcc
I felt this deserved a poetic mood!
THE PASSING YEARS
The passing years leave traces on the soul,
And some we do not realise are there,
Until we chance to think of some past role,
Some thought that makes us suddenly compare.
And then we realise Time takes its toll,
We realise our trees are gaunt and bare.
Our present days are calmer, milder, duller.
Our memories are rich and full of colour.
*
*
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
IMPS
'You're a little imp!' we say of a child
Who may be rather rude and wild.
We say it rather tenderly,
To the 'little imp' in our family.
And yet, in Germany of yore,
Imps, appearing in old folk-lore
We're rather nasty little creatures,
With crafty minds and ugly features.
Admittedly they were lesser sprites
Than the evil Demons who gave men bites,
Stole their children and scared their wives,
And made a mess of the peoples' lives.
Imps were, in a way, depressed,
They even longed to be caressed;
To get attention they acted badly,
Jumping out and laughing madly;
Hiding in boxes and under beds,
Tearing the newly-washed sheets to shreds.
Like children they got up to pranks;
Knotting the Granny's knitting hanks,
Making the milk in the pail go sour,
Putting insects in the flour!
But these 'little ones' were not attractive,
Just wild and silly and hyperactive.
A toddler human is quite delicious;
These little imps could be malicious.
But it shows that people then understood,
That the needy aren't always the good;
That a cry for help can come from a soul
That seems to others as black as coal.
That the ugly, the wicked, the dispossessed
May need affection more than the rest.
The old-time Germans, it seems to me,
Knew a great deal of psychology!
*
14 comments:
'Our present days are calmer, but much duller' - I rather like the calm!
'Imp' always sounds affectionate but your poem shows them as suffering from ADHD:-)
Loved your poem ~ can't believe how apt it is for me at this particular time of huge loss ~ but your words really speak to my heart ~ Lib xx @Libithina
I enjoyed both the Passing Years and the Imps. You are brave to try the o r form. Loved the imagery of colorful memories. Thank you sharing both. I think we have been beset by imps at some point.
I enjoyed both the Passing Years and the Imps. You are brave to try the o r form. Loved the imagery of colorful memories. Thank you sharing both. I think we all have been beset by imps at some point.
And a great poetic mood you've left me in. Maybe it's Memorial Day, or the ending of a school year. The passing of time has been occupying my thoughts these days, too. You put the form to wonderful use here. This is an excellent construction.
~Brenda
how well you've taken the ottava rima form and done with it! I leave here smiling :)
Monty / bummy
Beautifully constructed and rhymed ottava rima. True too. Life doesn't seem as edgy or as adventurous once we start closing our doors and making our chances. Beautifully expressed.
I love the bonus "imps" poem. Very clever. The imagery so strong I felt as though I were watching them. Both were excellent. Thank you, Gay
Reflective use of the form for life's seasons
I like the classic style in which you've written your Ottava Rima - you have done the form proud in subject and technique.
I think our past memories get more "colorful" as we reminisce and each precious story is retold! Great subject for this format, gives this a classic, old-fashioned feel.
One wonderfully introspective Ottava Rima and a simply delightful look a childhood that no one who has ever had to care for an "imp" can read and not smile fondly. Applause x2.
nice. the first one so true as we look back coloring our memories...and the second very well stated..working wiht disadvantaged kids i can tell you it is true...
The passing years...how true they leave traces on the soul.
Loved both of these. You have a wonderful style to your writing.
Although I love words and writing prose and learned English, I have no type of discipline when it comes to poetry/prose. Unless I 'google' it, I don't understand what the 'imabic lines abababacc.' means.
I've always thought that if I learned how to write prose/poetry properly, it may somehow impede my thoughts and alter their natural flow etc. But, I do like your writing very much.
I have a 15 year old hyperactive IMP here.... I can so relate the those in your prose....LOLOL
I was born and raised in Brighton by the way, live in PEI, Canada now.
Post a Comment