Inclement

THE MAG

http://magpietales.blogspot.com.au/

provided the illustration

INCLEMENT

There's a time in all our lives........

Before we're grandmothers and wives.......

When weather hasn't any power,

Be it deluge, be it shower.

As we age we start to grizzle

About the dampness of the drizzle.

We start complaining about the breeze

And how it's whipping round our knees.

We squabble over the allocation

Of the umbrella's situation.

'Hey! Mind my eye! with those blasted spokes!' ......

And, believe me, we're not making jokes.

But there are times when we recall

That weather didn't count at all

In those long-gone days of sweet romance

When all the raindrops did was dance.

Even the cold rain of December

Felt like a benison, I remember.

If we felt damp, and water trickled,

It didn't chill, it merely tickled.

And then we laughed and laughed together,

Sharing the big joke of the weather.

These two will, one day, be so staid

That rain will make them both dismayed,

But, just for now, soaked to the skin,

It's a perfect climate that they're in.

*

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THE EAGLEPHANT

(A Fable)

An Elephant and an Eagle chanced to meet one day.

Said the Elephant to the Eagle 'Why do you look that way?

Why have you mighty wings that beat and let you rule the sky?

How come you are the King of all that great big realm on high?'

Said the Eagle to the Elephant ' It's because I am the best;

Very much superior to you and all the rest.'

'Oh no!' replied the Elephant ' I am of much more worth

Because I rule the creatures that are living here on earth.

My strength is truly wondrous; I could crush you with one blow.

I am superior to you. I think you ought to know!'

They argued and they argued about who should be the King,

The creature on Terra Ferma  or the creature on the wing.

They wrangled and they wrangled  and they almost came to blows

Till they both said 'This is silly! Why should we two be foes?

Let us combine our attributes, then all will be aware

That the mighty Eaglephant is King on Earth and in the Air!'

And so the Eaglephant was born, in truth a mighty creature

An Elephant with Eagle's wings, a most unusual feature.

But it was one that could not fly because of the great weight

And, in the jungle, it could not move! Such was the creature's fate!

Time and again the Eaglephant tried to run and soar,

Testing its equipment till it could try no more!

Exhausted, collapsing on the ground, it admitted its defeat

Admitting that an Eaglephant is an easy thing to beat.

So one went back to flying and one to stomping round,

Both of them magnificent, in the air or on the ground.

The moral of this story is  'Be happy with your lot'.

Or else you may lose even that which you thought you had got!

*

Elections

  

THREE WORD WEDNESDAY

http://www.threewordwednesday.com/

we are asked to use the three words in blue

ELECTIONS

Elections, whether here or there,
Are something I find hard to bear.
I feel I'm being manipulated
And that is something I've always hated.
Labour and liberal, right or left,
Politicians all, are deft
At spin, a modern term expressing
Trickery, and that's depressing.
They dangle carrots , tell lies neatly,
And make me lose confidence completely.
Why don't they tell the truth and say......
"Sometimes I will lose my way,
Sometimes I will get things wrong,
Stumble as I go along.
The other side has great ideas
I've copied some of them for years.
I'm only human, just like you.But somehow I will muddle through."
Instead of which they stand and crow
About how well our lives will go,
How rich we'll be, how safely guarded.
With such rubbish were bombarded.
And each and every new orator
Speaks to the lowest denominator
Experience, over the years, has taught......
Take everything with a pinch of salt.

*

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SHEEP'S CLOTHING

Nigel was a perfect gent;

I knew that from the start.

He was just the sort of well-bred chap

To win my timid heart.

He wore a tie, while Max and Jim

Were always rather rumpled.

His clothes were always perfectly pressed;

He was never creased and crumpled.

Being a ladylike sort of girl

I admired his savoir faire

I thought the two of us would really click,

And end up as a pair.

He had a job at the local bank;

Not well-paid but secure.

And all his conversation

Was beyond reproach and pure.

Max and Jim told dirty jokes

And guffawed in their beer.

Nigel never stooped so low;

He really was a dear.

It was fine on the journey home

Until we turned the corner,

When, suddenly, he turned and said

'Let's strip off in the sauna'!

I was completely flabbergasted!

He must have seen me wince.

But he really won me over

And we haven't looked back since!

*

Let-Down

THE MAG

http://magpietales.blogspot.com.au/

supplied the illustration

LET-DOWN

After the party I made my way home,
Feeling my life was drab.
The most exciting event that night
Had been the ride in the taxi cab!
Nothing seemed to be going my way.
Timothy hadn't called
And Eddie had said we were all washed up.
It seemed my life had stalled.
As we approached the house I saw
The windows ablaze with light.
Had one of them actually changed his mind?
What a delightful sight!
If it were Eddie I'd make quite sure
That I didn't seem too keen.
I'd toy with him, yes that's what I'd do
After all, he had been mean
If it were Timothy I'd have row
And put him on the spot.
I didnt want him to get the idea
That he was all I'd got.
I rushed up the pathway, and through the door
Lips all pursed for kissing.
I'd certainly show these errant beaux
Exactly what they'd been missing,
There was my house ablaze with light
And not a man in sight!
I'd forgotten to turn the lights off
When I'd gone out that night!

*

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THE GREAT GOD THOR

With his great red beard and his muscled arms

He once ruled in the sky.

His hammer was the thunder

That men heard as he passed by.

The sparks flew from his anvil 

And men saw the lightning flash,

And all the power on earth was there

Amid the roar and crash.

But he was also god of farming,

So the ancients must have seen

A link between  his power

And a world of verdant green.

And still the link continues

Between energy and growth;

And still we hold the old dream dear

That we can have them both.

For Thorium is ours to mine

And to use instead of coal.

Thorium, not uranium,

Can play a useful role.

Named after the great god on high

And found in many places,

It's likely to be cleaner 

Than the black fuels it replaces.

Safer, cleaner energy;

We'll need it more and more.

Once more we'll find we give our thanks

To the power of the great god, Thor.

*

Ism

Optimism 

RUBY TUESDAY

ISM

Are you an ismist? You probably are.

Is an 'ism' your guiding star?

Babarism is one you may follow,

Though that idea is hard to swallow.

Confucianism is thought to be

A pretty great ideology.

Fatalism  is believed by many,

Who say 'Free will? There isn't any.'

Hedonism? We're on the brink

But we've still got time to dance and drink.

Jingoism ? Raise the flag!

(Even though it's just a painted rag,)

Nihilism is dark and drear;

Followers say the end is near.

Paternalism  from those who say

'I'm the man so I get my way.'

Terrorism .......  buzz-word now

On everybodies' lips, and how!

*

If 'isms' get you all excited;

If all your passions are ignited,

By this or that or the other idea,

Then it is absolutely clear

That you're an ismist!

What a lovely word

For something obviously absurd!

*

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SPARKLING GREY

A grey, grey day in Sydney;
Drizzle, and lowering clouds,
Many raised umbrellas,
Damply scurrying crowds.
But still the water sparkled,
And the gulls were still in flight,
And still the lovers sang their songs
As though the sky were bright.

*

Oh Dear!

MELLOW YELLOW MONDAY
http://mellowyellowmonday.blogspot.com.au/

OH DEAR!

Don't you just love this cartoon!

Old age is certain to come too soon!

And then the bits of tattoo art

Will very slowly make a start

To slide and slither, crease and crinkle,

Disappearing in each wrinkle,

Until that bird of Paradise

Becomes a shape that's not too nice.

It may look like a draggled chook!

And that is not the cutest look!

What's started out as a sweet love-heart

May soon migrate to some other part!

Down to the buttock it may slither

Where it may misshape itself and wither.

It may end up as a shapeless blob,

And, Granny, that will make you sob.

Piercings (another modern fad)

Are ghastly, but not quite as bad,

Because, when the silly age is past

You can get rid of them....and fast!

But tattoos, sweetheart, are for ever.

I don't think you have been too clever!

*

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PLASTIC ROMANCE

Said the Little Mauve Bike to the Little Green 'Thing'

'I always feel skittish in the Spring.

The Yellow Top Twins are a boring pair;

The way you look is much more rare.

It's clear you don't conform to the herd;

I'd like to be your Dolly Bird.'

(You must agree that it's fantastic

How I've found romance in some lumps of plastic!)

*

Disgruntled

MAD KANE

supplied the first line

DISGRUNTLED!

A woman who tended to whine

Told her husband that he was a swine.

She said 'I have found,

Just by looking around

That no husband's as awful as mine!

*

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IN THE MALL

When we had that conversation, 

The casual one in the mall,

I didn't tell you I felt fine

Not missing you at all.

We talked in a stilted manner

About our daily lives,

No nasty innuendos,

No sticking-in of knives.

I asked about your mother;

You asked about my trip;

I said I was very busy;

We didn't make one slip.

We didn't remind each other 

Of the very last time we'd met;

Of the screaming accusations

That I know I don't forget.

We didn't mention the anguish

That we both were thinking of;

We didn't even hint at

That terrible thing called love.

I didn't mention Josie,

You didn't mention Ben.

Although they were so important

Way back, way back when.....

Both of us pretended

To be quite at our ease,

As though we'd just erased them,

The awful memories.

There were no backward glances,

No sentiment at all.

We were completely natural,

When I met you in the mall.

There was that one omission

So an apology's due.......

I didn't say 'I no longer love you.'

How could I? It isn't true.

*

Floral Messages

FLORAL MESSAGES

The thesis is written, the brain is washed clean,

The students rejoice in some fun on the green.

I'll wear a hibiscus displayed in my hair!

What else would a beautiful girl want to wear?

But where's the right flower? Oh this one will do!

Which ear shall I choose? I just haven't a clue.

But my skin is all creamy, my hair has a sheen,

I'm as young and as Springlike as any girl's been.

*

Now don't spoil it for me by being pedantic!

Not now when I'm feeling relaxed and romantic!

A flower on the left sends a message, you say,

That a girl hopes a new love is coming her way.

Well, that's for hibiscus! This flower of mine

Is a totally opposite sort of a sign!

My flower is saying my loved-one is true,

And I wont be looking for anyone new!

*

328.Lover's Leap!

LOVER'S LEAP!

Oh the romance of it! I could weep

When I see this gorgeous Lover's Leap!

Weep with joy that such emotion

Such desire and such devotion

Could lead to gymnastics such as this;

All, maybe, for one brief kiss!

I never inspired a man or boy

To demonstrate this; a jump for joy.

I was lucky if they shuffled,

If their romantic words were muffled,

If they seemed a bit half-hearted

When romance (with a small 'r') started.

I was grateful for a peck,

Though I hoped for pearls around my neck!

But dangerous dreams stopped me from sleeping;

Dreams of young men wildly leaping!

They never did, but I'm consoled

By the fact that not all this tale is told.....

When she's frowsty, lined and plump,

Will he still jump when she says 'Jump!'