Monday, November 22, 2010

Hat-hazzard!


MICROFICTION MONDAY
http://www.stonyriver.ie/

HAT-HAZZARD!

'Oh Rudolph! Wrong again!
He said 'nose' not 'hat'!
Right colour! Wrong spot!
Santa wants a chat!
*
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NOTOX!

I'm glad there wasn't Botox when my wrinkles all began;
When I still had some ambition to attract a passing man.
When I was forty/fifty lines were just a part of life
And I never heard of anyone submitting to the knife!
I didn't welcome wrinkles, that I must admit
But I simply saw them as my fate and just planned to submit.
All my friends were wrinkling so I didn't care that much
As for my husband I'd always been just his 'dear Old Dutch'!
How many years ago was this 'Race against Time' started?
How long since a lady and her lines were by science parted?
The syllable 'tox' is off-putting! I believe rat-poison's involved!
A rather drastic way of getting facial problems solved!
It isn't where it starts that counts; it's where the process ends.
No-one really wants to be the talking-point of friends!
'Has she? Hasn't she?' ' Bet she has!' the gossip-mongers mutter.
'Is her surgeon a needle-man or is he a drastic cutter?'
Just think, when all the treatments cease and the change reaches completion,
The nose may look as smooth as silk with a little touch of Grecian,
But the upper-lip, which is untouched, may look wrinkled as a prune
And nose and lip may look at odds and not the least in tune.
And, as the years go flying by (and they will, no doubt about it)
Parts of the face will have missed the boat. Botox? They've done without it.
So the final face will be a mask that gives the viewer shocks;
Like pieces from two jigsaws, each from a different box!
They gain some mid-life sex-appeal but then there's this awful catch.....
When they should be aging graceful they're just a sad miss-match!
Hell will have to freeze over before I try this cure,
Although the 'warning signs' are there upon my face, for sure!
Maybe I'm jealous for I know I missed this Eternal Youth,
But I'd rather relax and enjoy old age with my wrinkles.
That's the truth.
*  

14 comments:

Sylvia K said...

Ah, have to learn to pay attention, Rudolph!! Fun one for the day as always, Brenda! Hope you have a great week!

Sylvia

Kay L. Davies said...

Brenda, your posts are always so interesting, even Rudolph and Santa. And wrinkles. LOL
-- K

Kay, Alberta, Canada
An Unfittie's Guide to Adventurous Travel

Jim said...

Very fine, Rinkly! :) Rudolph must have my ENT. She said come back in five years for another hearing test.
..

gaelikaa said...

Loved your microfiction! Thanks for the smile :)

kaykuala said...

Brenda,
Rudolph got it wrong again! Explains why he's found on the wall.

izzy said...

seems my ears don't work so good either!
thanks-

SouthLakesMom said...

Poor Rudolph...it is TOO CLOSE to the big event to be pissing off Santa!

I also like your NOTOX poem. My health clinic referred me to a dermatologist for some pre-c skin places which were easily addressed. However, this derm was located in a very upscale area and wanted to give me lots of advice all manner of youthening agents.

I'd much rather be comfortable than trying to chase the fountain of youth! And Brenda, I biggied your photo and you look LOVELY!

Peggy said...

Brenda;

Poor guy, I hear Santa can be pretty tough on his employees.
Nice one.

Pat said...

Oh, poor Rudolph...He must need a hearing test. But at least now all the other reindeer won't laugh and call him names and he'll be able to play the reindeer games because of his cool hat.

Dianne said...

fantastic poem!! love it

sylviamorice said...

Poor Rudie--now all the other reindeer will probably tease him about his hat! Thanks for mking me laugh.
Cheers!

Diane said...

Rudolph's got some problems there..... Happy Thanksgiving! :O)

EG Wow said...

Oh, poor Rudy got it wrong! :)

septembermom said...

I think Rudolph needs to take some notes next time!!