312.Check Mate!

I like men! Honestly! But they're particularly useful when it comes to making jokes!

CHECK MATE!

Young Billy came home with a car

And Billy was only thirteen!

It was parked in the drive

And, heavens alive,

It caused a most terrible scene!

His Mother said 'You're just a child!

How could you have come by a car!'

And Father said 'Son

It cannot be done!

The whole thing is really bizarre!

Not only a car but a Porsche!

And not only that but brand new!

Now let's get this straight!

If there's one thing I hate

It's dishonest dealings from you!

Did you steal any money my boy?

Come on now, look me straight in the eye!'

Said Billy 'I had

Enough money Dad!

It wasn't expensive to buy!
It was just fifteen dollars that's all,

And I easily had that to pay.

I just paid the cash

And then, in a flash,

I was in it and driving away!'

'Just give us the name and address'

Said Mother, still out of her mind.

'Right from the first

I was fearing the worst!

These people are tricksters, we'll find.'

Later on Mother found the right house;

She knocked and a woman came out.

'So you are the one

Sold a Porsche to my son!'

Said the Mother ' Well! What's it about?'

I'll explain' the young woman replied,

Not looking at all disconcerted;

'I'm here on my own;

Tom, my husband has flown

To Hawaai. Yes, I've been deserted.

He's run-off with a dizzy young blond!

He tells me he's not coming back.

At first I felt mad

And a tiny bit sad

But I'm getting my life back on track.
Well, this Monday a letter arrived.

Would I please sell his wonderful car.

So he'll then make a splash

With our mutual cash!

Spending most, I've no doubt, at the bar!

When I saw your young lad in the street

I asked him how much he could pay.

Fifteen dollars! Yippee!

That was just right for me!

It should reach Honolulu  today!