The saintly Mother Theresa went up to Heaven (of course).
For her life had been entirely without blame,
And all the trumpets sounded as she entered in the Gates,
And an angel chorus glorified her name.
When it came to supper-time she discovered that her meal
Was some tuna with a morsel of dry bread,
And she ate it very gratefully as you'd expect her to,
And 'Thank you, God' Mother Theresa said.
But she took a little idle peek to the Other Place below,
To that place of endless horrors known as Hell,
And she saw the folk there feasting on venison and steak!
In fact, the Damned were eating very well!
Next night when mealtime came around her food was just the same,
Tuna and bread! Just like the poorest peasant,
And when she once more took a peek and glanced down into Hell
She saw the Damned were eating quail and pheasant!
At last she plucked up courage to question her own fare
And God replied 'There's only Me and you.
There are untold millions eating in that other dreadful place!
It hardly seems worthwhile to cook for two'