WRITING IN THE BUFF
http://www.writinginthebuff.net/2011/10/book-blurb-32.html
supplied the illustration
Would this blurb make you buy this book?
WINGED VICTORY
by
Beaky Wingford Q.C.
supplied the illustration
Would this blurb make you buy this book?
WINGED VICTORY
by
Beaky Wingford Q.C.
Bert Scudmore is a Pigeon Fancier.
Mrs Scudmore is not.
'Nasty noisy creatures!' she says.
Finally, she leaves the marital home.
'Good for nothing, those birds!' shouts Sally Scudmore, as she leaves.
*
For the next fifteen years Sally roams the world.
For the next fifteen years Bert perfects his pigeon prowess.
*
Read how Percy, Bert's favourite, finally finds Sally in a Norwegian forest.
*
Follow the adventures leading up to her rescue.
Marvel at her prowess as a Go-Go Dancer in Rouen!
Gasp at her exploits as a bag-lady with the Mafia.
See the seedy world of Hemel Hempstead through her eyes!
But, above all, learn about Pigeons!
Ten pages of story; three hundred pages about Pigeon Fancying.
(Can you see Percy on the book cover?)
*
From 'Pigeon-Fancying Perfected' by 'Pouter' Higgins: ' Read this book and learn what 'bird-brained' really means!'
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Mrs Scudmore is not.
'Nasty noisy creatures!' she says.
Finally, she leaves the marital home.
'Good for nothing, those birds!' shouts Sally Scudmore, as she leaves.
*
For the next fifteen years Sally roams the world.
For the next fifteen years Bert perfects his pigeon prowess.
*
Read how Percy, Bert's favourite, finally finds Sally in a Norwegian forest.
*
Follow the adventures leading up to her rescue.
Marvel at her prowess as a Go-Go Dancer in Rouen!
Gasp at her exploits as a bag-lady with the Mafia.
See the seedy world of Hemel Hempstead through her eyes!
But, above all, learn about Pigeons!
Ten pages of story; three hundred pages about Pigeon Fancying.
(Can you see Percy on the book cover?)
*
From 'Pigeon-Fancying Perfected' by 'Pouter' Higgins: ' Read this book and learn what 'bird-brained' really means!'
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
HOUSEHOLD HINTS
1.
Do you often get downhearted
When the socks of a pair are parted?
The washing process separates
Those little socks which should be mates!
Keep safety-pins in a handy spot
Then you'll never lose the plot.
Join the socks for the duration,
And avoid this washing complication
*
2.
Bridge may be the game you choose,
In your home or on a cruise,
But you may find the cards get sticky
(Human hands can be quite tricky!)
Even manicured hands, in time,
Can leave a patina of grime!
Before you buy another pack,
Giving your well-loved cards the sack,
Try talcum-powder as a reviver!
Your pack will be a proud survivor!
Sprinkle and wipe and you will find
You've left the grubbiness behind.
*
3.
Dammit! Broken glass again!
A goblet or a window pane!
The shards lie there upon the ground!
I'll cut myself soon, I'll be bound!
I must be careful where I tread!
But, if I take a slice of bread
And press it into the shattered pieces,
The need for extra vigilance ceases!
Every tiny pin-point bit
Will soon embed itself in it!
Throw the bread away with care
And you'll forget glass was ever there.
*
