Wednesday, April 4, 2012

The Crushing

 

BOOK BLURB FRIDAY
http://www.writinginthebuff.net/
supplied the 'cover'


Would this blurb encourage you to buy this book? 

THE CRUSHING
By
Elouisa Elphinstone
(The eighth in her horrifying 'End of Everything' series.)
*
Mrs Elphinstone does it again!
She manages to make us laugh about
Armageddon!
*
This time she chooses
The Extreme Cold
Scenario.
*
Alf and Mandy Spindle
Happen to be on holiday
In Majorca
When the news  arrives;
'The Earth is definitely freezing over'.
*
All people on earth accept that
The End Is Nigh.
*
Alf and Mandy learn that
Little-Puddling-in-the-Marsh,
Their beloved home village,
Is already under a layer of thick ice!
They must look to the South.
*
Enjoy their hilarious exploits as they,
And a billion other human-beings,
Try to escape the advancing sheet of ice!
*
Copy their Survival Hints.
They may come in handy one day!
*
Finally, they discover a cave
In the steamy jungle.
They will start a new civilisation!
*
But, just as they are about to organise
The preliminaries
A gigantic cube of ice
Rolls in and
They realise that
All is lost.
*
Will the branch
Save their lives?
*
Tension at its most Tense!
*
The Global Heating Advocate; After reading this remarkable book I have torn up all my scientific papers and I now believe we're heading for an Ice Age. This magazine will close down forthwith.
 The Editor.


---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------





ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT!
(From a Mad Kane suggestion)

A girl who took pride in her style,
Thought she'd wear nothing else but a smile.
She was so double-breasted,
She soon was arrested,
But she's bought a new bra for her trial!
*

1 comment:

Mama Zen said...

I love the limerick!