I went up to the pharmacy to buy some little pills.
(For even perfect specimens can suffer minor ills!)
I was feeling lithe and limber, and only about sixteen;
The creaks weren't over-creaky (and you'll all know what I mean).
My back was fairly youthful; I had done a mirror-check
And the widow's hump was covered by a scarf around my neck.
The hair-dye was still evident; there wasn't too much grey,
And I almost skipped along the path as I made my merry way.
I bought the pills. ( And now I know you're straining at the bit
To ascertain my 'problem'. Well, darlings, this is it.....
I want to make a Satay dish this-evening for our tea
And I sometimes get all swollen from a peanut allergy.
I was buying anti-histamine! Not terribly exciting!
But tonight that Chicken Satay will be safe and so inviting!)
I chose the pills, I paid the young assistant with a smile,
Feeling youthful and attractive and quite lovely all the while.
I left the shop and checked my docket, standing in the street
And what I read demoralised me! Knocked me off my feet.
My bill had been discounted! I nearly hit the roof!
'Pensioner discount' written large......
AND SHE HADN'T ASKED FOR PROOF!'